Once I Saw You, Now I Don't
by Time Travel Maniac
Summary: Padme thought she saw the boy several times, but she never took the time to consider that he might be more than a figment of her imagination. Now it was too late. Or: Padme sees an echo of the future, granting her a glimpse of her future son.


The first time Padme saw the strange boy, she was on Tatooine, waiting for Anakin to come back from his search for his mother. She was worried about him and tired of pacing around inside the Lars's small homestead. They were kind, but their sympathetic glances were getting wearisome and definitely weren't helping with her anxiety. She sighed and ducked outside for some air. She straightened up and took a few steps, then a movement behind her caught her eye.

Another boy had just ducked out of the same doorway she had, one that she was certain she hadn't seen here. He was so transparent that he looked almost like a ghost. For a moment, she thought he was Anakin, but she quickly saw the differences. This boy's hair was more straight, less unruly. His features were softer, his blue eyes more innocent. He was dressed in Tatooine farm clothes and he had a look of longing upon his face as he stood there, gazing at the horizon.

Her brow furrowed. She didn't remember meeting him in the past, but he looked - felt - familiar. She squinted at him, trying to remember where she'd seen him before.

"Hello?" she tentatively called. The boy turned his head, but as soon as they made eye contact, he vanished, leaving nothing behind except heat waves distorting the sandy landscape. It was as if he had never been there. Padme's brow furrowed. Had she really seen that? Or was it just a mirage?

Faintly she saw a trail of dust in the distance. As it got closer to the Lars homestead, she saw that it was Anakin on his speeder. He was carrying someone. A suffocating cloud of fear and foreboding descended upon her as she glimpsed the dark pain and anger on his face.

000

The next time she saw the boy was in a dream shortly after the Clone Wars started. The dream didn't make much sense, as it was mostly made up of jumbled images. The only thing she could clearly remember when she woke up was that the boy - still in Tatooine farm clothes - had swung across a huge chasm with his arm around another girl's waist. She woke up with the image of a red lightsaber seared into the backs of her eyelids and the sound of his grief-stricken scream - NO! - echoing in her mind, though she didn't know what had happened to make him sound like that.

000

Padme didn't dream about him again. It was a long time before she saw him as clearly as she had that first time on Tatooine. Up until then, all she heard were ghosts of whispers (she thought she had heard the words Hoth and wampa) and the faintest of laughter. One of the latter had come after she thought she heard someone say something about a scruffy-looking nerf-herder.

000

The second time she saw him clearly was even stranger than the first time. She was on Bespin, waiting in Cloud City's ovular capitol building to see the governor, preparing to negotiate his terms for joining the Republic. She was sitting in a pristine lobby when she felt a pull from the stairs. She looked up from her datapad and glanced over at them. She saw nothing, but still felt that strange pull.

She stood up and slowly walked down the stairs. She walked through a few tunnels until, finally, she saw him. He looked a little older than the last time she'd seen him and he wore different clothes - these ones looked like army fatigues. He looked wary, ready for anything to jump out at him. Padme's eyes strayed to his hand, where he was holding a vaguely familiar lightsaber.

"Who are you?" she murmured, more to herself than to him. Despite this, he apparently heard her anyway. His head snapped around and his blue lightsaber ignited, but just like last time, he vanished the instant blue eyes met brown.

"Senator Amidala?" came a voice behind her. She jumped and turned around.

"Oh, Governor Bryan," she sighed in relief. "You startled me."

"I'm sorry, Senator," he apologized. "I didn't mean to."

At the top of the stairs she paused. A ghost of an agonized wail drifted up to her ears. Could it be the boy she had just seen?

"Nooooooo!" His faint cry echoed, bouncing around the stairway. "That's impossible!"

"Senator?" Governor Bryan's voice brought her back to earth and the sounds stopped. "Are you alright?" The sounds silenced abruptly, like someone switching off a recording.

She blinked and shook her head. It was just her imagination.

"Yes, of course, I'm fine."

000

Who was this mysterious boy? Was he even real? She had no idea. At least, not until…

Padme let out a strangled shriek as another contraction rippled through her body. An image of the boy flashed through her mind - his eyes, his smile. Vaguely, she wondered why she was seeing him now, after everything that had just happened. Tears streamed down her face. Suddenly, a baby's first wail cut through the air.

"Aida oigo," came the voice of the medical droid.

"It's a boy," she heard Obi-Wan say.

"Luke," she rasped. She gasped quietly when her infant son's face came into view. Oh, he was so beautiful, so perfect! If only Anakin were here to see him… he'd be so happy. She reached up and touched her son's face. "Oh, Luke!"

"Mother?" She barely noticed the faint, so very faint word. She just attributed it to the pain making her hear things. Suddenly her face contorted as another contraction rippled through her body.

A few minutes later, she thought she saw Anakin watching her, but when she snapped her head towards him, she realized that it wasn't him. Instead, it was the strange boy. Again, he looked different - he was dressed in a Jedi cloak, he looked a few years older and his eyes were filled with ocean of sadness and wisdom. His eyes - why did they look so familiar?

Blue eyes.

Blonde hair.

Perhaps it was foolishness, perhaps it was the fire lancing through her body and burning up the last reserves of fuel she had left making her delirious, but suddenly she was certain. Luke. It was her Luke! It was him, all grown up! "Luke!" Unlike the last few times, they managed to lock eyes for a few seconds before he dissolved into thin air - long enough to see his sky-blue eyes fill with tears. NO! She mentally begged. Let me stay! Let me stay here with him! But she could feel the last remaining dregs of her body's willpower draining away like water through her fingers, dragging her vision into blackness, sucking away the life she should have had, at least the one she should have lived for her children. Her children… Her beautiful boy… her lovely daughter… such beacons of light...

"Obi-Wan," she murmured, more for her son, her Luke, than for him, for by that age he had to know who his father was, and somehow, she knew that he could still hear her even though she couldn't see him. She had to tell him… had to let him know... "I know... there's still good in him." Darkness encroached upon the remaining light in her vision. "I know… there's…. still…"

* * *

 **Hello, all! This was a one-shot I wrote a few years ago. I made a few edits and decided to post it and see what you all think. I'm not satisfied with it, but I've spent too long working on this. I have other things that I've been procrastinating all day. I've always hated the fact that Luke and Padme never got the chance to know each other, I know they would've gotten along great. I like the idea of Padme getting to see him before she died. I'm planning on writing a sequel one-shot to this from Luke's point of view, but we'll see if I actually do it before the year ends. I have SO much homework to do. Like that essay... that's due tomorrow... that I still haven't finished. I'll shut up now and go work on that.**

 **Review!**


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